How to tell someone their socks stinks?

Last month, I received an email from my friend Linda asking, "How do you let a person aware that their socks or shoes stinks?"

Well Linda, This is a very sensitive issue and many people I know dare not point it out to someone that their socks or shoes is making the air in closed enclosure very sour and smelling bad, worst in a car, a flight cabin or small office. Not many people can take direct hints in a positive constructive way but I have found that subtle and friendly approach always worked wonders.

Never ever use sarcastic remarks as this will embarassed the person unnecessarily. If it is in the airplane, the flight attendant is the best way to pass a small note to the passenger sitting next to you. Write in a polite way, on a small note, asking the person to keep his or her feet in the shoes throughout the flight. If you feel uncomfortable about letting the person next to you aware that you could smell his or her socks odour, you can also asked the flight attendant to spray some air freshner in the cabin. The flight attendants are trained to discreetly walk up and down the aisle with a small air freshner spray hidden in their palm.

A small trick I've used that helped me through sticky times is to have a few sachets of wet freshner which I carry in my bags all the time. This wet tissues comes in many different scents and I like the citrus aroma as it is very refreshing and great way to clean the hands at the same time neutralising bad odour in the air. It is also not overwhelming strong like a perfume we usually dabbed behind our ears. I usually don't put on strong concentrate fragrance when flying because some people are allergic to the fragrance of concentrated perfumes.

Most of my colleagues at my office knew that I am a very happy go lucky person and always making jokes, to lighten up the daily stress. I often use jokes to hint about socks or shoe sales and the importance to change socks daily to avoid foot fungus from breeding in the shoes. After 2 years, sneakers especially are known as a notorious breeding ground for fungus and these fungus can contaminate other shoes as well. When foot fungus got mentioned, most people become concerned about foot and shoe hygiene. This tactic usually worked very well. A while ago, I approached a junior intern and asked him, " do you have a cat at home?"

His answer was, "yes, why?"

"I'm just curious," I said, "thought I could smell something like cat's pee from your shoes even when you're a few feet away, but don't worry, its not a very strong one. I just happen to have a very sensitive nose," and told him a few things about my cats at home and how they like to sleep under the shoe racks. I use to have cats before but not anymore.

After lunch that day, that young intern stopped by my office and thanked me for letting him know about his shoes. Apparently, during lunch hour break, he had bought a new pair of shoes.

I immediately seized the opportunity and complimented him on his choice of style and said, "you know, your shoes will take up better mileage and smell fresh even longer with a daily change of socks. Cats don't really like fresh smelling shoes."

Ever since that day, we established a better working relationship, and more open to each other during project discussions with a level of trust like never before. I think people generally are concerned about this sort of things. It is just that, our own nose is immune to our own bodily smell and without the help of another person's nose, we will never know how much we stink.

Just like in many real life situations, it is not what is being said that matters, but how it is being said that makes the difference.